Economic Priority in Marriage

Spiritual Compatibility in Marriage

　　Yes, as I have just said, we're going to fall. We're going to have four minutes for each side. So don't worry about the 330; I'm going to give you another 330 seconds. So let's put our hands up and welcome our first debater from the economic side. When you're ready, MJ, you can just turn on your mic, and your time is started. Okay, let's keep off, so.

　　We started to think about this topic actually. People may know that we're going to lay a lot of emphasis on being rich. It's all about money, but we certainly thought about it, and it's not. The range of economies is fairly wide; it's not just about money. So I would like to tell the difference between being rich and being wealthy, okay? There's quite a difference in there. So if that was just talk of money, we would like to redefine what wealth is. Well, wealth is when we have a kind of strong inner core, right? And we're being confident when we try to be independent, so we have enough self-sufficiency. Which means we're wealthy enough to know who we are, what we want, and then based on that, on top of that, we will kind of pursue the kind of mental world that we're trying to achieve. So just like why are we here, why are we trying to debate on Sunday morning? Just because we're wealthy enough. We kind of try to, we have a strong inner core; we try to keep ourselves updated, we try to listen to others. So those kinds of strong inner cores inside of us might make us wealthy enough. So in life, in our daily life, we try to keep up to date or we try to listen to others' different opinions. So that's kind of what wealthy enough is, instead of just being rich.

　　The history of the origin of marriage, previously, it was derived from the agricultural age. So it was just kind of to help the couple survive, kind of to survive easily. But why do people get less willing to get married? Just because lots of us, let's say most of us, are not in property or we're not. Again, kind of a lack of environmental stability, which is saying that. Lack of environmental stability, which is saying that we come into a bad situation. And the marriage, the definition of marriage has started evolving, and people, especially not just for men, but also for independent ladies, right? For now, we found that especially in big cities, people are wealthy enough to start rethinking what the definition of marriage is. So why am I just getting involved with someone before I kind of think about a complete version of myself or what I want? I just kind of sacrifice myself for the marriage or my parents tell me to get married. So that's kind of a different definition.

　　So now our side of thinking is this: instead of just talking about money, on top of that, we talk about independence, confidence, and self-sufficiency to make people wealthy enough to make that choice. And self-sufficiency to make people wealthy enough to take that position, okay? That's pretty much everything we want. Thank you very much. Thank you.

　　I cannot hear you, you haven't turned on your MIC. No, yeah, I can see your camera has turned on but I cannot hear you. Yeah. I can see your mouth is moving, but yeah. Maybe also. You want to use the top left corner there's a... Yes. Okay, well we're still having issues. Per my last message, I'm going to be the first one to speak. Okay, I'm Andrew, I'm from Indonesia, so maybe some of you know that Indonesia is a religious country and I have a religion myself, I'm a Catholic, so for me, spiritual compatibility is very important to me. Of course, economic stability is part of preparing for marriage, and if you have no economic stability, it's better not to get married because you might make the problem even bigger. But the thing is, when we see people who have a lot of money, like Bill Gates, what's the point? Maybe people relying on money or material things for happiness in marriage is like bullshit. If that's the case, the wives of the world's richest men would be the happiest women. Is that why we think about how we connect with people? Because we're not only physical; we have a spirit as well. When you have spiritual support, when you have each other, we have problems every day, right? And then, why don't you have a partner to face all the problems to be happier? If you put your happiness only in material things like money, maybe you only have short-term happiness, and then what happens after that? You need more and more. Secondly, when you have spiritual compatibility, when you support each other, you can connect and feel happier because you have someone to connect with. In happy times or bad times, we need that connection. That's why most couples who stay married are either very wealthy or simple families who don't expect much. If you work outly to get a lot of money for your family but never... either for your family, then the marriage is going to end in force anyway. So I think spiritual compatibility is very, very important because when you are happy in marriage, you have no sense, no reason like... on your partner. Rather than just staying together through the storm at any time. I think that's what I can share with you guys today. Oh good. Thank you. And now you have 90 seconds for the first bidder and both sides, MD and Angelw. Each of you has 90 seconds. Let me quickly check: each of you has 90 seconds. So we go with MD first. I have a quick question. In terms of consistency and sustainability, let's say without a strong inner core, let's talk about connection and cheating. I say as long as you have a strong core, the connection will keep updating to match each other instead of just being connected at the very beginning. To keep matching up instead of just being connected at the start, and they don't want to change the spiritual world, which is the result of divorce, right? So the question is what do you think of sustainability without a strong core? Are you trying to stay in the marriage alone? Cannot last longer. Thank you. Okay, that's a question.

　　No problem, you have three minutes about the background. OK, OK. And they are all my friends and the visitors here. Today, I thank you for the opportunity to speak my points of view. Thank you for listening. Your speaking is impressive. That here are my opinions. So, when we talk about marriage and when we talk about economic priority, here are my three points.

　　First, economic stability is the shelter that protects love. Just imagine that marriage is a ship, and love is the sail that catches the wind and gives it direction. But in reality, the economy is the basement.

　　Secondly, prioritizing the economy is prioritizing responsibility. Because marriage is a long-term contract. When we say the economy first, we are saying that we want to build a harbor for our long-term contract, to weather the big storm that may come. Finally, it is not about money over love; it is about money for love. We are not materialists; we are realists. We believe that economic preparation is the most sincere way to say "I love you." OK, so the economy is the most practical and powerful form of that—economic preparation is the basement.

　　Thank you so much. Right, thank you. Let's invite our second speaker.

　　Maybe a little bit like in the tosmaster robots, I need to put a little bit. So according to research, a lot of couples, for example, if you're a religious couple and you're putting God in the center of your marriage, please stay longer. But when you put it aside, like the spiritual aspect, to make it neutral, when you set aside the spiritual, you don't have the... Here for satisfaction, you're going to try to find it somewhere else. That's why the conflicts and the new issues happened. I think that's what I can say from my question.

　　Oh, good. Thank you. So next, we're going to invite the second debater from the economic side, which is Zoe? Zoe, yes.

　　So just like what Zoe said, marriage is not like a business theory, nor is it like a contract, right? Can you guys hear me this time? Okay, so it's not like a business deal but a long-term, long-term cooperation based on love. What you said is that economic conditions are like a shelter to protect love. That means love comes first, and then we need economic conditions to protect it. For me, I think marriage is not only that. The reason why marriage exists is because we have ritual needs, and we want these two souls to come together—we call them soulmates. Or people want to choose to stay together for such a long time. The reason a long-term marriage doesn't happen is not just because of a lot of comfort; we need economic conditions. So we're talking about which one is the priority in marriage. It doesn't matter if we're not discussing whether one is important or not; both are important, but when it comes to comfort, what's the priority over economic factors for us? So I think the priority is the spiritual part, which is very important for people, just because we also define spiritual compatibility. It's like the reason we come together is because we have shared values, similar hobbies, and we choose each other as adults, as individuals, with the will to choose who to spend the rest of our life with. So I think it's willpower that makes this happen, and it's driven by our minds, feelings, and love—this romantic stuff. There are a lot of people, a bunch of people who don't lack money; they're rich, wealthy, maybe the richest people in the world, but that doesn't mean they have the happiest marriage. So for us, spiritual compatibility is much more important, yet. That's all for my speech. Okay.

　　Okay, thank you Nancy. Okay, so we had a similar discussion with my friends from the USA last year, and he asked me, "Do you know the current divorce rate in China?" At that time, I did some research, and the primary reason was economics. I imagine that young couples might start with love, but for a marriage to last 10, 20, or 30 years, economics is the first factor that can either help them continue the relationship or cause it to break up, okay? Just think about rent, housing costs, education expenses, and everything else—all the things that require money in marriage. So according to the report, when people decide to enter a marriage relationship, they must take economics very seriously.

　　No problem, thank you! Okay, I just noted that you mentioned that marriage might be like a sheep going through a big storm, but this is definitely a bit of an oversimplification. Why should we choose a partner, especially a life partner, to face these big storms with us? We have many other ways to face different storms—business partners, friends from different fields, etc. So why is marriage necessary? For example, there are many examples like TV CEO Jia Yule and his wife. They are business partners and also have a good marriage, but later, when love becomes impure and mixed with business, the relationship becomes complicated. If you don't pay enough attention to making it healthier and caring for each other, even with a lot of money, where does love go? That's my opinion on this question.

　　Thank you, Bates. Next, we're going to invite our third speaker.